Dear Awakening Church Family,

My prayer for you this month is that you are thriving in the love and truth of our Lord Jesus Christ. As we walk together in faith, I am eager to share a book that has profoundly enriched my relationship with God. I first read this book while on deployment aboard the USS Maryland. Prior to departing for patrol, I had been watching R.C. Sproul's conference videos, and this book was mentioned by several pastors among their recommended readings outside the Bible that have significantly impacted them. A Body of Divinity has since become a steadfast companion, bringing me closer to the heart of God. This book is on my “read each year” list, and I hope it will bless you as abundantly as it has blessed me.

Author: Thomas Watson (c. 1620–1686) was a Puritan preacher and author, renowned for his pastoral heart and eloquent exposition of Scripture. A graduate of Emmanuel College, Cambridge, Watson served as a minister in London until he was ejected for nonconformity in 1662. His writings, including A Body of Divinity, The Godly Man’s Picture, and The Doctrine of Repentance, reflect his gift for blending doctrinal precision with practical, heart-searching application, making him one of the most beloved Puritan writers.

Content: A Body of Divinity is a masterful collection of sermons based on the Shorter Catechism, covering foundational Christian doctrines from the nature of God to the hope of heaven. Watson took me on a journey through topics like the Trinity, creation, the fall, Christ’s redemptive work, and the last things, all while rooting every point in Scripture. The plan behind a recommendation such as this one is that we would come to understand and love the truth that that theology is not just for the mind but for the soul. Watson helps us to know God and, in this masterwork, reveals God’s glory and calling believers to live for His praise. Each section begins with a catechism question, followed by biblical exposition, theological reflection, and practical application. Watson’s vivid illustrations and poetic style make complex truths accessible—whether he’s unpacking “What is the chief end of man?” or exploring Christ’s priestly office. His emphasis on the God-centeredness of doctrine, paired with heart-stirring calls to devotion, sets this book apart as both a theological treatise and a devotional treasure. For anyone who’s ever felt adrift in the sea of doctrine, Watson’s clear, Scripture-soaked approach is like a lighthouse guiding you to the solid ground of biblical truth.

Who Should Read This Book?
• Christians seeking a deeper understanding of the Bible’s core doctrines.
• Pastors or Bible study leaders looking for a resource that’s both scholarly and pastoral.
• Believers hungry for theology that warms the heart and stirs worship.
• Anyone curious about Puritan spirituality and its relevance for today.

Recommendation: Reading A Body of Divinity is like sitting at the feet of a wise and loving mentor who patiently unveils the majesty of God with every page. Watson’s words are a tapestry of Scripture, woven with care to both teach and inspire. His ability to make lofty truths feel like a warm conversation makes this a must read for anyone seeking to know God more deeply. I would offer a single word of warning, although the Puritan style may take some getting used to, Watson’s vivid imagery and pastoral heart make every effort worthwhile. Awakening Church, let this book be a companion in your pursuit of God’s glory. It’s a treasure that will linger in your heart and mind.

Always remember:
“Visit many good books, but live in the Bible.”
– Charles Spurgeon

In Christ,
Ryan Milne

Family Integrated Church is a concept that aims to welcome people of all ages into the worship of God by following the principles of Scripture. 

At Awakening Church, this commitment to Scripture has led to the decision to staff a nursery for children up to the age of two, while all others above that age participate in the Church's regular services in the main sanctuary. This approach is a specific implementation of the family integrated church conviction, which varies in its application among different churches.

Why should I be excited about family integrated church?

1. There is only one salvation.

Acts 4:12 “And there is salvation in no one else, for there is no other name under heaven given among men by which we must be saved.”

All people are, regardless of age, ability or any other factor, saved only by calling upon the name of Jesus Christ.

2. There has been given a specific way of spreading that salvation.

Romans 10:14 “How then will they call on him in whom they have not believed? And how are they to believe in him of whom they have never heard? And how are they to hear without someone preaching?” 

God has chosen one specific way that his Word is to be spread, and that is not given to us in any modified way based on the age or skill of the person hearing. We all must hear preaching to call on God.

3. Children are addressed in the context of a church in the New Testament writings.

Ephesians 6:1 “Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right.” 

In the letters that Paul wrote to the churches in Colossae and Ephesus, he takes the time to address children. Paul doesn’t give a note to parents on how to instruct their children, he expects them to be within hearing of the letter, right next to their parents, learning from the same lesson.

4. We see examples of the results of those raised in the knowledge of God’s Word.

2 Timothy 3:14–15 “But as for you, continue in what you have learned and have firmly believed, knowing from whom you learned it and how from childhood you have been acquainted with the sacred writings, which are able to make you wise for salvation through faith in Christ Jesus.” 

This verse is a wonderful example of the faithful action of parents and guardians leading to not just the mental assent of the child, but of their growing into a position to be used greatly with God based on knowledge of Scripture.

5. Children are gifts, not a burden.

Psalm 127:3 “Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord, the fruit of the womb a reward.” 

The Bible, in no uncertain terms, teaches us that children are a blessing from God. We attempt to show our gratitude by faithfulness in all parts of our life, and children are a significant part of that.

6. Children and adults learn through difficulty.

Hebrews 12:11 “For the moment all discipline seems painful rather than pleasant, but later it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it.” 

The bringing of children into the new situation of “adult” church will initially involve a learning curve. That learning curve will certainly involve some discipline and training; teaching them how to be (mostly) still, (somewhat) quiet, and encourage participation during service. But just as we learn in Hebrews 12, this is how our Heavenly Father teaches us, and we are called to imitate his efforts for our own children.

Conclusion

In short, a “family integrated church” is a church where you can read Ephesians 6:1 and Colossians 3:20 and the intended audience is there to hear it. There is no command to separate the people of God into groups for the ease of their instruction, and certainly not for the convenience of parents or annoyed congregants. Family integration in church is an effort taken up by the whole of those in attendance. 

Practical Considerations

1. Reach out to a member if you need assistance (e.g. when your husband is absent, or you are a single mother still teaching your children discipline in church), a member would be happy to sit by you to lend a hand and a watchful eye. If you find yourself feeling you need assistance with your children due to extenuating circumstances (dad/mom out of town, difficult morning. Please reach out to the congregation for help, we understand and would be happy to come alongside you in this effort.
2. If you need a place to rock a child to sleep or to let a little one walk out some energy, please feel welcome to take them to the back area of the sanctuary.
3. At the discretion of parents and their assessment of children’s maturity, supplemental materials are available (e.g. paper to draw/color on, clipboards, quiet toys).
4. We ask you to use your discretion, if a child becomes disruptive during service please remove them from the sanctuary for any disciplinary action or for a break. Please come back to join when ready. 
5. While we are in our temporary location, no food or drink is allowed in the sanctuary. We understand that little ones may have dry snacks/bottles, if so, we ask that you pick up after your family and ensure no trash is left behind.
6. Children and their obedience does not come from nowhere and cannot not be cultivated with once a week practice. A family’s commitment to building discipline during their daily family worship or devotions will greatly aid in their ability to behave and grow while attending Lord’s Day worship.

Resources
Book on the children in worship:
https://www.amazon.com/Let-Children-Worship-Jason-Helopoulos/dp/1781919097

Article on the above book:
https://www.thegospelcoalition.org/article/let-the-children-worship-in-church/

An article by John Piper where he explains his decision to family integrate:
https://www.desiringgod.org/articles/the-family-together-in-gods-presence

A practical article by John and Noel Piper covering the benefits of children in worship and practical advice on discipline:
https://www.desiringgod.org/interviews/should-children-sit-through-big-church

Joel Beeke Five-Part Series on “Teaching Children to Listen”:

• Part 1 - How to Prepare Children To Get the Most from Church

https://www.sermonaudio.com/sermons/14092057330/a

• Part 2 - How to Listen to the Sermon

https://www.sermonaudio.com/sermons/2109171897/a

• Part 3 - Putting Listening into Practice

https://www.sermonaudio.com/sermons/2809138483/a

• Part 4 - Teaching Children to Listen in the Home

https://www.sermonaudio.com/sermons/222091640495/a

• Part 5 - Teaching Children to Listen in the Home (Cont.)

https://www.sermonaudio.com/sermons/22809837360/a

Greetings to Awakening Church,

My prayer this month is that you are finding time to grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. In the spirit of that prayer, I want to offer a book that had a strong effect on my personal growth. In my past, like many Baptists, I fought through a dark place, visited by frequent bouts of “Presbyterian temptation”. Thanks be to God for clear and lucid writing able to bring me back from the brink. Authors such as Denault, Coxe, Owen, Barcellos, and Renihan have been like supportive companions, with Renihan's work in particular getting to the heart of the matter. I sincerely hope that you will also find the portrayal of Christ in this book as inspiring and enlightening as I have.

Author: Samuel Renihan is pastor of Trinity Reformed Baptist Church in La Mirada, California, and serves as an adjunct professor at International Reformed Baptist Seminary. Sam has authored various books on covenant theology, Baptist history, and the doctrine of God, in English and Spanish, such as The Mystery of Christ, His Covenant, and His Kingdom, Deity & Decree, and Crux, Mors, Inferi: A Primer and Reader on the Descent of Christ. 

Content: Renihan, a pastor and scholar with a gift for explaining complex theology, takes readers through the Bible’s covenants: from Adam to Noah, Abraham, Moses, David, and finally to the New Covenant in Christ. His big idea is that these covenants aren’t just random, disconnected promises—they’re a unified storyline that reveals God’s plan to redeem His people through Jesus. The book explores how each covenant builds on the last, culminating in Christ’s life, death, and resurrection, which establishes His kingdom and fulfills God’s promises. This book stands out with a focus on “1689 Federalism,” a Baptist take on covenant theology. Unlike some other views, it emphasizes that the Old Testament covenants were temporary and pointed to Christ, who brings the ultimate covenant of grace. Don’t worry if that sounds heavy—Renihan breaks it down with clear explanations and plenty of Scripture. Renihan’s emphasis on the Christ-centered nature of the covenants is both devotionally rich and intellectually rigorous, offering a fresh perspective that distinguishes Baptist Covenant Theology from other Reformed views. This book is the answer to the accidental Baptist, there is no longer a reason for not understanding the deep, theologically consistent, and historical Baptist covenantal history.

Who Should Read This Book?
- Christians wanting to understand the Bible’s storyline and how it points to Jesus.
- Baptists curious about their theological roots, especially “1689 Federalism.”
- Pastors or Bible study leaders looking for a solid resource on covenant theology.
- Anyone who loves theology and wants a book that’s both deep and devotional.

Recommendation: * Reihan’s work in covenant functions like the picture on the front of a puzzle box, without it you could still put the pieces together, it just gets so much easier if you understand what you’re making. Clear writing, a Scripture-soaked approach, and passion for Christ make this a book that informs your mind and stirs your heart.

Always remember:
“Visit many good books, but live in the Bible.”
- Charles Spurgeon

In Christ,
Ryan Milne

Greetings to Awakening Church. Based on our schedule, we missed March’s book review. However, we did move an entire church. With all our extra time on Sunday mornings, I wanted to suggest an excellent read that touches on more than its title suggests.

Author: James White is the director of Alpha and Omega Ministries. He is Professor of Church History and Apologetics at Grace Bible Theological Seminary, and has taught Greek, Hebrew, Systematic Theology, Textual Criticism, Church History, and various topics in the field of apologetics for numerous other schools. He has authored or contributed to more than twenty-four books.

Content: James White’s The King James Only Controversy dives into a big argument: Is the King James Version (KJV) of the Bible the only “true” English Bible, or are modern ones like the NIV and ESV just as good? I ran into this question when I first became a believer and was shopping for my first significant Bible purchase. White writes this to explain why he thinks the KJV-only crowd is off base and why newer translations are trustworthy.

After my conversion, I fell into the months-long trap of trying to figure out why so many claimed that people were “changing the word of God”. I used the King James version of the Bible for months, thinking that in the worst case, it was a defensive move in which I couldn’t go wrong. I certainly didn’t want to have some version of the Bible that had been nefariously altered guiding me in my faith.

The book starts with a quick history of the KJV—how it was made in 1611 using a set of Greek and Hebrew texts called the Textus Receptus. White compares that to modern Bibles, which use older, more varied manuscripts. His main point? The KJV is an awesome and historic translation, but it’s not perfect, and newer versions aren’t trying to ruin anything—they’re just built on better evidence.

James White takes on big KJV-only claims, like how some verses (think Acts 8:37 or 1 John 5:7-8) are “missing” in new translations. He says it’s not a conspiracy—it’s just scholars trying to get closer to the original words. He’s clear and smart about it, breaking down examples so you can follow.

The good: James White knows his Bible languages and history, and he’s great at debunking wild ideas (like modern translations being some evil plot).
 
The bad: It can get heavy with details about old manuscripts—this is cool if you’re a nerd for that, but might be boring if you’re not.
Recommendation: This book, written in 1995, still matters today because people still fight over this question. It’s perfect if you’re curious about how Bibles get made and don’t mind some heavier, brainy parts. If you just want a light read, it might feel like too much. If you have questions about your Bible version or are itching to begin learning about the science of textual criticism, this is a great place to start. 

Always remember:

“Visit many good books, but live in the Bible.”
- Charles Spurgeon

In Christ,
Ryan Milne

Greetings to Awakening Church, I hope this post helps you add another title to the never-ending list of worthwhile reads for the Glory of Christ! I was introduced to this title after finishing two other books by Renihan, and after being impressed I couldn't wait to see what he had to say about the descent of Christ.

Author: Samuel Renihan is a pastor, theologian, and author known for his quality work in the Reformed Baptist tradition. His other amazing works focus on covenant theology, the doctrine of God, and the historical roots of the Particular Baptist tradition of faith.

Content: This book places at our fingertips a theological primer and a detailed look into church history surrounding the topic of Christ’s descent into hell. Renihan writes in two parts, each serving a unique purpose and when put together sheds amazing light on this often misunderstood or overlooked aspect of Christology.

• What happened to Christ between the cross and the resurrection?
• Was anything accomplished while Christ was in the grave?
• Does the Bible have anything specific to say or is everything open to interpretation?

The first part functions as a primer and lays out a straightforward and biblically grounded case for understanding the descent of Christ. He ties the question of Christ’s descent to the victory of Jesus through the death, burial, and resurrection. He argues strongly using texts like Ephesians 4:9 and 1 Peter 3:19 that the question of where Christ went for three days has a real answer. This doctrine is tied inextricably to the victory of Christ and not associated with any of the false beliefs that Christ went to hell to suffer further or to be a sacrificial burnt offering.

The second part shifts as Renihan dives into historical theology. He unearths source after source from Reformation-era theologians who held strongly to an accurate view of the descent of Christ. He displays how this question was historically debated providing the reader with a rich historical perspective. Writing like this helps us tie our thoughts today with the giants of the faith who have gone before us and who considered this a topic worth meditation and debate. 

Recommendation: Renihan succeeds in a big way in both sections not only in content but in application. Renihan writes with an inviting tone allowing newcomers to this topic easy entry, but deeply enough that his exegetical arguments would satisfy a theologian or a pastor. Renihan opens before our eyes another reason to worship and glorify the God who truly conquered death and the grave.

Always remember:

“Visit many good books, but live in the Bible.”
- Charles Spurgeon

In Christ,
Ryan Milne

Greetings to Awakening Church, I hope this post finds you all doing well and glorifying Christ. Although I don’t plan on writing a review of everything I read, I thought a few of the more interesting titles would be beneficial to our congregation. I forget how I was introduced to this specific book, but it was an absolute delight to read with a respectful and scholarly tone while dealing with differing views on this subject.

Author: Tim Chaffey is the founder of Midwest Apologetics and works as the Content Manager with the Attractions Division of Answers in Genesis. He is responsible for developing the content for the Creation Museum and Ark Encounter exhibits.

Content: This book tackles some of the Bible's most fascinating questions about the Nephilim. Author Tim Chaffey combines a thorough inspection of related Biblical texts and extrabiblical writings to put together and discuss the three popular views concerning the Nephilim. He not only tackles each differing view, but he places those views in their respective place in church history and provides the backdrop as to why those views held prominence when they did. What were the Nephilim? Were they Giants? Were they fallen men or men who fall (attack) on other men? Were they men of incredible strength?  

My interpretation of Genesis 6:1-4 was always something I held to loosely. I had never had the time or opportunity to do much in-depth study concerning the orthodox interpretations held throughout church history. Tim Chaffey does an amazing job compiling some of the best resources concerning these questions:

• Who were the Nephilim?
• When were the Nephilim on earth?
• Who were the sons of God?
• What is the divine council?

Fallen provides a scholarly discussion of the three primary positions; the fallen angel, the Sethite, and the royalty views. Each view is looked at independently and the pros and cons of holding each are discussed. Fallen is broken down into chapters, designed to walk you through the differing interpretations and bring you out on the other side with answers. Tim Chaffey takes time to address the Biblical text and specific questions that arise from each view. Then, to top it all off the book contains an appendix with other adjacent topics that didn’t quite find a home in the primary work. The witch of Endor, female giants, imprisoned spirits, and the angelic rebellion are all walked through in the book's amazing appendix.

Recommendation: Although this book won’t break down any theological barriers, it deals with this third-tier issue of interpretation exceedingly well. I highly recommend Fallen for its exegetical content and respectful analysis of the historical positions. After reading Fallen, you might find another piece of the puzzle sliding into place, allowing a deeper, more complete understanding of the Biblical story.

Always remember:
“Visit many good books, but live in the Bible.”
- Charles Spurgeon

In Christ,
Ryan Milne 

Member Question: 
My question comes from Matthew 5:34. Is Jesus explicitly stating that we do not take oaths at all? In testing all my traditional beliefs, how do we discern what to do or not do? Things that come to mind: my oath to my wife, promises I’ve made to my kids, my oath to the military, saying the pledge of allegiance to our flag, taking an oath in court, Are these all sins? What does it mean biblically if you break an oath?

Sunday Pastor Ryan preached about God taking an oath to Abraham. I understand that God can’t sin. However, God is also the only one who can keep an oath because he cannot fail, and he cannot lie. So just because God did it, I can’t say that I should be able to as well. I look forward to your guidance on this issue.

Understanding the Question

This topic has bubbled up more than once over the past few weeks and I appreciate the chance to speak on this specific issue. I want to try and break the question down and answer each part, here is what I see being asked.

1. Is Jesus explicitly stating that we do not take oaths at all, what about all the oaths I’ve already taken, are they all sins?
2. What does it mean biblically if you break an oath?
3. Is God the only one allowed to make oaths because only God can guarantee that an oath can be kept?

Wisdom From the Confession

Before I even begin to answer, I wanted to include the wisdom given in the 1689 LBCF. It speaks directly to this topic, although it might not answer all the specifics brought up in the question. You can read the section about lawful oaths and vows here:

Chapter 23 – Lawful Oaths and Vows
Although our only infallible rule of faith is scripture (Sola Scriptura), the historical orthodox teaching of the church can provide enormous benefits by giving a consistent understanding of scripture on those topics it addresses.

Look at the Text

First, let’s look at the text this question is coming from.
Matthew 5:33-37 33 “Again you have heard that it was said to those of old, ‘You shall not swear falsely, but shall perform to the Lord what you have sworn.’ 34 But I say to you, Do not take an oath at all, either by heaven, for it is the throne of God, 35 or by the earth, for it is his footstool, or by Jerusalem, for it is the city of the great King. 36 And do not take an oath by your head, for you cannot make one hair white or black. 37 Let what you say be simply ‘Yes’ or ‘No’; anything more than this comes from evil.

There is one other text where this same topic is spoken of, and I wanted to include it for consideration also. James repeats the teaching of Jesus regarding oaths almost verbatim.

James 5:12 But above all, my brothers, do not swear, either by heaven or by earth or by any other oath, but let your “yes” be yes and your “no” be no, so that you may not fall under condemnation.

Awakening Answers
Let’s go through the main issues brought up by the question and address each in turn.

Is Jesus explicitly stating that we do not take oaths at all, what about all the oaths I’ve already taken, are they all sins?

This question arises because some take the prohibition of verse 34, “Do not take an oath at all” to be all-inclusive of any oath or vow however or whenever made. In general, it is the Anabaptist denominations who interpret this way (Amish, Hutterite, Mennonite, Brethren). I see this as a misinterpretation of the text for more than one reason.

1. On numerous occasions in Scripture, we read about the taking of an oath being not only sanctioned but commanded. (see Deut 6:13; 10:20; Psalm 15:4; Rom 1:9; 2 Cor 1:23; Phil 1:8; 1 Thess 2:5, 10)
2. God himself takes oaths. (see Gen 22:16; Psalm 110:4; Heb 6:17-18)
3. The God-man Jesus seems to have no reservations about speaking under oath. (Matt 26:63-64)

After considering scripture like this I conclude that our text in Matthew, and the same teaching in James, does not prohibit the taking of legitimate oaths and vows. When Jesus said, “Do not take an oath at all”, he was referring to the kind of so-called oath-taking promoted by the Pharisees. This kind of oath-taking was not made explicitly in the name of God. In taking oaths by lesser things, they intended to obtain confidence in what they said without putting themselves in any jeopardy if they proved to be liars. In other words, if your oath to something other than God (i.e. my mother’s grave, on my life) is for the express purpose of escaping the force and sanction of the vow, you must not swear “at all”. It is this kind of shallow swearing, not all swearing, that Jesus condemns.

We can also be helped by the context provided in Jesus’ teaching. If the intention were to condemn all swearing, the passage would teach just that and nothing more. The text would communicate “Do not take an oath at all” and be done with the topic. That is not what we have in the text, we have a further explanation of what kinds of oaths are specifically forbidden. The additional context provided by

“…either by heaven, for it is the throne of God, 35 or by the earth, for it is his footstool, or by Jerusalem, for it is the city of the great King. 36 And do not take an oath by your head, for you cannot make one hair white or black.”

gives further indication that not all swearing was prohibited, but a certain type of swearing contained dishonesty through dissociation. The rest of the text is added, as further exposition, to explain the former “Do not take an oath at all” by giving example cases.

Not only is this my interpretation of this text, but I believe it to be the apostolic interpretation by example. If it were true that Jesus forbade all swearing of oaths and vows by this teaching in Matthew 5:33-37 then we would expect to see the Apostles operating with that correct interpretation. Instead, we see the opposite.

• Paul is under a vow in Acts 18:18.Paul is under oath in Rom 1:9.
• Paul is under oath in 2 Cor 1:23.Paul is under oath in 1 Thess 2:10.
• Paul is under oath in Gal 1:20.Paul is under oath in Phil 1:8.

What does it mean biblically if you break an oath?

This is an important question concerning the topic of oaths, vows, and swearing. What Jesus is doing with this teaching is explaining that all conversation has an eternal witness, not just our oaths or vows. Every word from the mouth displays its source. We are committed to honoring our Father in Heaven with truth, or the evil one who is the father of lies. That is why Jesus teaches that “anything more than this comes from evil”. Because anything other than the truth comes from the evil one who is the source of lies (John 8:44).

The text in James 5:12 is helpful when answering this question. It tells us the reason for abandoning the sinful use of swearing an oath to undergird false statements, “so that you may not fall under condemnation”. The word translated there as condemnation is the Greek word krisn, most used to communicate judging, decision, sentence; generally: divine judgment; accusation. This word has to do with divine judgment every time it is used in the New Testament. This warning is about the seriousness of a lying tongue and James elevates it to the point of saying eternal judgment is what comes about because of lies.
This functions as another way to communicate the seriousness of taking the Lord’s name in vain (Exo 20:7). In this case, the taking of the Lord’s name in vain would be done by breaking an oath taken in his name or by all the things that belong to Him on earth or in heaven. Not only is it sinful as a curse word, or as a flippant exclamatory, but a lie demonstrates a complete disregard for the glory and worth of God. God’s sentence on the heart that pours forth lies and false oaths is death in hell. The end of the entire warning passage in Matthew 22 in which oath-breaking and false oaths are contained, is the sentence of hell.

Matthew 23:33 33 You serpents, you brood of vipers, how are you to escape being sentenced to hell?

James 3:6 is so clear on how dangerous the tongue is, and he speaks about it as setting the whole course of our lives on fire.

Then in Revelation 21:8, we have the destination of the one who is called a liar, “the lake that burns with fire and sulfur, which is the second death”

All of this is to say that there is no small thing at stake when the issue of truthfulness is concerned. The Glory of God and eternity are on the line when topics of the heart like this one are discussed. This doesn’t mean that throughout our entire lives, we’ll never say anything that isn’t true. James also says in 3:2, “if anyone does not stumble in what he says, he is a perfect man, able also to bridle his whole body.” A Christian will sin with their tongue. There will be times when we speak untruth, but it is not the way of our hearts. It is not the unbroken pattern of our lives. The sin of lying is the exception rather than the rule in the life of a believer.

James gives us a clear view into the heart of man. If your life is marked by swearing, using the name of God to persuade people you are truthful, and that’s the predominant pattern. That person stands ready to be sentenced to hell. On the other hand, when regeneration happens, and the new heart lives by God and for God we are made as new creations. We have a love for truth; and the new life pattern of a believer is a pattern of truth – not a perfect life with no lying, but discipline and repentance over sin as the exception in our lives, not the rule of it.

Is God the only one allowed to make oaths because only God can guarantee that an oath can be kept?

This is another good point to bring up. When studying scripture, we need to correctly determine if what is being written is descriptive or prescriptive. In this case, what is being asked is:
Just because God makes oaths doesn’t mean that we should. All the oaths God makes will be able to be kept and therefore He will never sin when making them. On the other hand, we might fail at keeping an oath. So, since we can’t guarantee our oaths will be kept, isn’t it better to never make any at all?
God may indeed do what we may not do. But in the context of Scripture and by example, what God has commanded, regulated, and done Himself suggests that this is one of those things in which God’s action is not just a historical record for us but a pattern for us. 

I would end with these thoughts,

There can be many appropriate instances where oaths and vows can be made. Neither Jesus nor James is discussing these areas. Instead, the context of the teaching and the Apostolic example show he is informing the everyday speech throughout the Christian community. As believers, our word is to be trustworthy, so we don’t need to swear an oath every time we make obligations and contracts to one another. If we find that our speech is untrustworthy, and we have the need to swear our truthfulness in all of our conversations, then perhaps we have not truly embraced the God of all truth.

Prov 4:23 23 Keep your heart with all vigilance, for from it flow the springs of life.

Our Thursday evening discussion at Awakening Church about the biblical boundaries for relationships with unbelievers led to a follow-up question.

How should a Christian couple with young children govern relationships with unsaved family members? Would holidays together or sleepovers with grandparents be sinful or unwise?

This is an amazing question and I love the heart of the parent that thinks this way for two reasons. It shows the deep concern to fulfill the real responsibility to guard and raise a child in the Lord, and it shows a concern to honor parents and family relationships that God has sovereignly ordained in our lives.

I’ll begin by saying there are many circumstances that I won’t be able to predict or cover. For those difficult situations, I recommend speaking with your Elders and bringing their wisdom to bear on the specific scenario you may be confronted with. Apart from that advice, we can see in Scripture many helpful truths as we manage these types of relationships and priorities in our lives.

Honor Christ Above All

The honor, respect, worship, and obedience we owe to Christ must come before and govern all other relationships. Christ's blood-bought right over our life places upon believers the divine requirement for real, loving deference to God. This obedience to Christ in the ordering of our lives flows from a regenerated heart out of love for the Savior and functions as evidence to ourselves and those around us that we have been born again. These truths give us some good and wise boundaries for relationships surrounding unbelievers, even unbelieving family members.

As believers, we should avoid false religion, depart from ungodly traditions, and not participate in family sins. Insofar as any circumstances would include those behaviors, we must show deference to God and not the world, even when that includes unsaved family or friends. Instead, our lives should revolve around the priority of (especially concerning our children) church attendance, biblical instruction, worship, ordinances, service, evangelism, and the living of each day for the glory of God.

Raising and Protecting Children

Christian parents have a God-ordained duty to perform concerning their children. We must start by believing this truth. Abraham is told to “command his children and his household after him to keep the way of the LORD” (Gen 18:19). Fathers are instructed to “not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.” (Eph 6:4). The wisdom of God tells us to “Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.” (Prov 22:6) When we approach situations regarding our children, it’s not just the removal of negative influence or sin that should be a concern, it’s a lack of positive obedience that weighs heavily on my thinking surrounding this issue also. When thinking through these circumstances we must remind ourselves that there is no neutral ground for the world or for grandparents to stand on. In my experience, this kind of thinking dominates the issue.
 
If the unbelieving grandparents don’t actively or openly sin (e.g. cursing, blasphemy, drunkenness, movie choices) my children should be okay to spend a week or a weekend with them alone. It might not be a positive or Godly environment, but the grandparents have agreed not to do certain negative or sinful things in front of the children.

This line of thinking maintains the possibility of creating neutral ground on which the children could be handed over for certain agreed-upon visits or vacations. Scripture gives a different perspective when it comes to the possibility of neutrality. Jesus taught that “Whoever is not with me is against me, and whoever does not gather with me scatters.” (Matt 12:30) Those two things are not similar at all, gathering and scattering are opposed to each other in every way. Understanding this about neutrality helps us to draw parental boundaries for the glory of God, and the good of children.

We understand these principles more innately when it comes to physical situations.  Would you allow your child to sleep over in a situation that would potentially bring them bodily harm? No. This question should be answered with the same kind of ease when spiritual harm is considered. The issue is that while we are rightly attuned to watchfulness for physical danger, we act as if spiritual danger is of minor or no consequence.
When the parents and children can be together during family gatherings, holiday events, or family visits wise biblical boundaries for sinful, God-dishonoring behavior can be used to protect the children. At the same time, positive commands and duties of a believer may be taught and exemplified for the children’s instruction and edification.

When setting up biblical, God-honoring boundaries for children, God’s commands to parents and the spiritual good of children should be considered top priorities. These don’t have to be static positions. As children age and mature the boundaries may change based on evolving circumstances, but to treat the parental duty and spiritual well-being of children as secondary concerns would be to miss the mark in a major way.
 
Your parenting is the most significant influence in the life of your child, and Godly parenting should fight back against the harmful influences that seek to destroy not just the bodies but the souls of our children.

God’s Sovereignty in Family

After considering what has been said, we should also remember that none of us have been placed in families by accident. The wisdom and purpose of God are as active in our family makeup as in individual salvation. 
When we find ourselves in situations where unbelieving family members can hear and see the gospel of Christ, we should avail ourselves of every opportunity to make clear their need for a Savior. When we make wise decisions that place God in the highest place of honor and glory, we give our unsaved family members exactly what they need. Compromise and acceptance of sin (such as unbelief) are ineffective methods for displaying the radical need for saving grace in a sinner's life. 
These opportunities may be used to teach children the importance of evangelism and prayer by starting with beloved family members who have yet to accept the gospel. Don’t shut out an unsaved grandparent from your lives completely, instead use these moments to display the importance of the gospel message to the family God has given you. This kind of biblical love must be grounded in the Word of God and not the compromise of emotion. Be prepared for questions, confusion, or even anger by unsaved relatives who might be provoked by their feelings over your decisions and spiritual boundaries, and pray that their need for Christ is made clear in love. (Eph 4:15)